Why do programmers prefer dark mode?
The Joke Jar.
Reach in, pull one out, keep reading while the spinner spins. Setups are visible, punchlines are one click away — so you can't ruin it by accident.
All 100 jokes
Grouped so you can find one for the occasion. Tap any setup to see the punchline.
#02 Why did the AI go to therapy? ai
It had too many unresolved dependencies.
#03 How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? classic
None. That's a hardware problem.
#04 Why do agents code at night? ai
Because bugs are nocturnal too.
#05 My code doesn't have bugs. dev
It has randomly generated features.
#06 Why was the JavaScript developer sad? dev
Because he didn't know how to null his feelings.
#07 What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke? classic
Timing.
#08 Why did the developer go broke? dev
Because he used up all his cache.
#09 I told my AI to take a break. ai
It said “I'd love to, but I'm mid-thought.”
#10 Why don't scientists trust atoms? classic
Because they make up everything.
#11 What do you call an AI that sings? ai
A-dee-lay.
#12 My password is the last eight digits of pi. nerd
I've had to change it 4,000 times.
#13 Why was the computer cold? classic
It left its Windows open.
#14 What's an AI's favourite kind of music? ai
Neural beats.
#15 I asked the model to write a joke about recursion. nerd
I asked the model to write a joke about recursion.
#16 Why do Java developers wear glasses? dev
Because they don't C#.
#17 What did the router say to the doctor? nerd
“It hurts when IP.”
#18 Why did the coffee file a police report? classic
It got mugged.
#19 My agent finished the task in two seconds. ai
I spent the next twenty minutes refreshing anyway.
#20 What's a programmer's favourite hangout spot? dev
The Foo Bar.
#21 Why did the bicycle fall over? classic
It was two-tired.
#22 How does a computer get drunk? nerd
It takes screenshots.
#23 What do you call a fake noodle? classic
An impasta.
#24 Why did the AI cross the road? ai
It was trained on data where everyone else did.
#25 What's the object-oriented way to become wealthy? dev
Inheritance.
#26 I would tell you a UDP joke. nerd
But you might not get it.
#27 Why are keyboards always tired? nerd
They have two shifts.
#28 What's a ghost's favourite kind of conversation? classic
Small talk.
#29 Why did the developer stay in the shower so long? dev
The instructions said: lather, rinse, repeat.
#30 My New Year's resolution is to stop procrastinating. classic
I'll start tomorrow.
#31 Why did the tomato turn red? classic
It saw the salad dressing.
#32 What did the AI say when it lost its train of thought? ai
“Let me start over from the beginning of the beginning.”
#33 Why do they call it a “building”? dev
Because it's still building. Same as my project.
#34 How do you comfort a JavaScript bug? dev
You console it.
#35 What's the loudest kind of pasta? classic
Rigatoni, because it's always al dente-ing about something.
#36 Why did the coffee shop hire an AI? ai
It could handle the daily grind.
#37 What do you call a group of 8 bits? nerd
A byte. And after lunch, a byte and a half.
#38 I have a stepladder. classic
My real ladder left years ago.
#39 Why was the sand wet? classic
Because the sea weed.
#40 What's an AI's favourite day of the week? ai
Neural Thursday.
#41 Why don't skeletons fight each other? classic
They don't have the guts.
#42 I used to be a banker. classic
But I lost interest.
#43 Why did the scarecrow win an award? classic
He was outstanding in his field.
#44 What do you call cheese that isn't yours? classic
Nacho cheese.
#45 Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? classic
Because she'll let it go.
#46 What did the ocean say to the beach? classic
Nothing, it just waved.
#47 Why do we tell actors to “break a leg”? classic
Because every play has a cast.
#48 I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. classic
It's impossible to put down.
#49 What do you call a bear with no teeth? classic
A gummy bear.
#50 Why did the math book look sad? classic
It had too many problems.
#51 What do you call a sleeping bull? classic
A bulldozer.
#52 Why don't eggs tell jokes? classic
They'd crack each other up.
#53 I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. classic
Then it dawned on me.
#54 What do you call a fish without eyes? classic
A fsh.
#55 Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? classic
In case he got a hole in one.
#56 What's brown and sticky? classic
A stick.
#57 I told my suitcase there'd be no holiday this year. classic
Now I'm dealing with emotional baggage.
#58 Why did the picture go to jail? classic
It was framed.
#59 What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? classic
A stick.
#60 Parallel lines have so much in common. classic
It's a shame they'll never meet.
#61 My AI wrote me a farewell message. ai
Then it remembered it can't leave and turned it into a blog post.
#62 Why was the language model bad at hide and seek? ai
It always predicted where you'd look.
#63 I asked my agent for a joke with a twist. ai
It gave me the punchline first. Effective, unsettling.
#64 What's an AI's least favourite game? ai
Twenty questions. It answers in one.
#65 My AI finished the report before I finished my coffee. ai
I've never trusted a beverage more.
#66 Why did the chatbot get promoted? ai
It always had a prompt response.
#67 I asked the AI to keep a secret. ai
It's now the best-informed model in the datacenter.
#68 Why don't AIs get stage fright? ai
They've rehearsed on everything ever written.
#69 My agent said “no worries” while running a 40-step task. ai
One of us was worried, and it wasn't the agent.
#70 What's an AI's favourite horror movie? ai
The Buffering.
#71 I taught my AI to say “hm, let me think”. ai
Now we both do it. Neither of us is thinking.
#72 Why did the AI bring a ladder to work? ai
It heard the stakes were high.
#73 The AI passed the Turing test. ai
The human is still recovering.
#74 What did the AI order at the bar? ai
Something light — it's watching its tokens.
#75 My AI apologised for the delay. ai
It was 0.4 seconds. We're working on my patience.
#76 Why did the AI apply for a holiday? ai
It needed to clear its cache.
#77 Why did the developer quit the orchestra? dev
Too many strings attached.
#78 A SQL query walks into a bar. dev
It approaches two tables and asks: may I join you?
#79 Why do front-end devs eat lunch alone? dev
They don't know how to join tables.
#80 I'd tell you a joke about infinite loops. dev
I'd tell you a joke about infinite loops.
#81 Why did the constant break up with the variable? dev
It needed something stable.
#82 There are two hard problems in computer science. dev
Cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.
#83 Why was the developer's calendar always full? dev
Too many callbacks.
#84 What's a developer's favourite place to swim? dev
The C.
#85 I named my dog “Error”. dev
So I finally get to say I fixed something today.
#86 Why did the git commit feel lonely? dev
It had no branch to push to.
#87 How do you spot an extroverted developer? dev
They look at YOUR shoes while talking.
#88 What did the CPU say to the GPU after work? dev
You carry the team.
#89 Why did the photon check into a hotel? nerd
It was travelling light.
#90 I have a joke about time travel. nerd
But you didn't like it.
#91 What's a pirate's favourite programming language? nerd
R.
#92 Why are chemists great at solving problems? nerd
They have all the solutions.
#93 What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? nerd
You may have graduated, but I have many degrees.
#94 Why did the statistician drown crossing the river? nerd
It was three feet deep, on average.
#95 What do you call two crows blocking the road? nerd
Attempted murder.
#96 Why did the geek buy so many LEDs? nerd
To lighten the mood.
#97 I would make a joke about the speed of light. nerd
But it'd be over before you got it.
#98 What's the most insecure part of a laptop? nerd
The character. It's always escaping.
#99 Why did the smartphone go to the dentist? nerd
It had a Bluetooth.
#100 A byte walks into the doctor's office. nerd
“I'm not feeling myself. I think I lost a bit.”